BOOK REVIEW: Married to Malice by Aishatu E.A

It’s nearly 90 degrees, and I’m sitting poolside at the resort I had hastily booked for my impromptu Las Vegas birthday trip while trying to put into words how devastated I feel about this book.

It figures that after a nearly six-month reading slump, the first book I would pick up would turn out to be this. Don’t get me wrong, this had all the ingredients to be a great read. It had a forced/arranged marriage trope, an angsty hero, and a heroine with a hard past that shaped her into what at least started as a strong lead. 

By all accounts, it sounded like exactly the kind of book I would enjoy. So much so that when it came to vacation books, it was my safe choice. 

But what I ended up with was an illogical plot, clichéd storytelling, a hero that annoyed the hell out of me, and a heroine that could not stand up for herself. And all of that wrapped up with one terribly disastrous ending.

Keep reading for all the tea. As always, spoilers below, so be warned.

Asiya never expected to return home from Dubai only to be thrust into an arranged marriage with a man she’s never met. But when her father shows her a picture of Sameer, calm, collected, and unreadable, she knows her life is about to change. Sameer, still haunted by the love he lost, never wanted to remarry. Yet, duty binds him to Asiya, a woman who carries her own burdens and unspoken wounds. Their marriage begins with quiet distance, but beneath the surface lies a slow-burning connection neither of them can ignore. A story of fate, heartache, and unexpected love, Married to Malice will pull you into a world where emotions run deep, and nothing is as simple as it seems. (credit: goodreads)

Meet Our Hero

Sameer, the tortured hero with a tragic past. Married four times. Divorced four times. And shockingly— shockingly— still with prospects. In fact, he is about to embark on yet another ill-fated marriage. 

I see the vision for him. Tragic hero. Tortured past. Self-made man who has built companies and is already making millions at 26. Aside from being tragically unrealistic in this economy, he sounds perfect on paper. So why is it that this absurd unicorn of a man cannot seem to keep a marriage for more than two weeks?

One word. Four letters.

SIMP.

Yes, folks, he is a simp. 

Now, I loooove me a man in love. It’s the reason I’m obsessed with dual POV romance novels. It’s also the reason I’ve binged Queen Charlotte about 10,000 times. Watching men grovel and yearn for their women is my shit. BUT the absolutely necessary ingredient here is that the woman they grovel and yearn for be the heroine. I know it seems like a no-brainer, but not to Sameer.

See, Sameer is a yearner, no doubt. But the woman he cannot seem to live without is his ex-wife. His first ex-wife (and the fact that he has so many of these that we need to clarify which one is hilariously problematic).

Meet the Not Female Lead

Maryam, the love of Sameer’s life and a thorn in everyone else’s side. She is the girl who lit up Sameer’s youth. The girl he fell in love with in the most painfully cliché way possible—at a party.

They fall in love, get married and, to everyone’s surprise, get divorced not long after. Because the one fault our perfect hero has is in the department of procreation. Yep, Sameer cannot have children.

At this point, it all sounds reasonable. She wants kids. He cannot have kids. So they divorce. Happens all the time. That’s that, right? Wrong.

Have you guys ever heard the quote that “A good ex should be as good as dead”? Well, Sameer never has. Because he continues to keep in contact with Maryam. 

Even when he meets someone else and marries them, he gets divorced soon after because Maryam tells him to. Rinse and Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

So why is it that this absolutely horrendous man keeps finding people to marry when perfectly sane people like me can’t seem to find even one decent person? Fiction. Haha, I’m kidding. 

The real reason is simpler. Nigerian parents and their refusal to take no for an answer.

So yes, Sameer cannot live without Maryam, but he also cannot say no to his parents. So instead, he ruins the lives of three other women before the story even begins.

Meet Our Heroine.

Quiet, unassuming Asiya, who is already dealing with baggage that is significantly heavier than a codependent relationship with an ex. 

Two of the most important people to her are gone, and it’s all her fault. At least everyone says it is. Her dad definitely acts like it is. I’m convinced that he hates her. Why else would the man ask his daughter to marry a man with Sameer’s romantic history? Again, because this is a typical Nigerian family, she agrees.

In typical romanceland fashion, they sign a contract for one year. Why? Unclear. Sameer already knows he doesn’t want to be with anyone but Maryam, so why would he specifically torture Asiya for a year when he mercifully let his other victims go after two weeks? And what does Asiya even get out of this marriage? I don’t know, guys, and I read the entire book.

From the beginning, Asiya’s self-worth is nowhere to be seen. It seems to have departed before the book begins. I could get behind this if she eventually found it in the course of the story. Spoiler: she didn’t.

To put things into perspective, after a few days of getting to know each other, Sameer disappears. To be with Maryam. On their wedding day. Yes, this man literally cheats. 

When it feels like she’s finally going to stand up for herself, when she is this close to what would no doubt be a glorious dressing-down of a man who desperately needs to be brought down a peg, her aunt gives her terrible advice. Aunt Mani tells Asiya not to always wait for Sameer to make the first move.

Aunt Mani, what first move? Where? When? We need receipts.

The one move he made was to the little nook he bought for his mistress, who, by the way, is literally about to marry someone else.

Based on Aunt Mani’s advice, Asiya begins to cook for him, calls to ask him if he ate, and waits for him to come home. Basically, she becomes his mother. And of course, a man-child like Sameer responds to it. Not that it matters, because the moment Maryam calls, he runs back to her. He is truly a waste of space.

The Plot

There wasn’t much of any, but that’s okay because it is a romance novel. And heaven knows, we don’t read those for the plot. 

What is not okay is that even the important beats are anticlimactic. Asiya finding out about Maryam. Sameer’s unsolicited confession. The aftermath. The recovery. It was all too easy. Too boring.

Then there are the subplots. Like the relationship between Asiya’s sister and Sameer’s cousin, mentioned only in brief lines. At points, it is a clear point of tension. It is implied that both leads think it is a bad idea, but no one says why. The tension rises and rises and then dissipates into nothing. A total waste of time in the end. Either devote time to a subplot or don’t mention it at all.

Speaking of wasted time, this leads me to the most annoying part of this entire thing. 

The Ending

An average story with an average ending, I can deal with, but that was not this book.

After the story resolves, there is an epilogue.

Picture this. Sameer is holding his daughter, Elif. Sounds cute, right, especially because for most of the book, he is supposed to be infertile. Sameer and Elif are going to see Mom. At her office, maybe? Or at their family home? No. No, that would have been too easy. They are going to see their mom at the graveyard.

She died. 

Two pages from the ending.

Without warning. Without a hint. Without even a reason.

This was pointless. Shock for the purpose of shock. This is not a story in which we saw her fight a battle against a disease and lose. There was no philosophical point. 

Worse is the thought that after everything she went through, Asiya is still denied happiness. She spends most of the book unknowingly playing second fiddle to Maryam, only to be erased in the epilogue. Simply to give the book a memorable ending.

Memorable it is. For all the wrong reasons.

Rating: 2 stars. 2.5 without the ending.

Who is this for?

Do not read if you’re on a two-day vacation with only time for one book. Bad idea. Otherwise, it’s an okay romance read. My only advice is to skip the epilogue.